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A Graceful Apology

There is something about a graceful woman. You know what I’m talking about. The kind of woman who just kind of seems to float into a room. It seems that grace is a bit of a lost art in our day and age. Instead of floating, most of us are shlepping around with our Uggs dragging every step of the way.

My mother is the most graceful woman I know. She doesn’t enter the room mouth first as I have been known to do from time to time. She is quietly efficient and self-contained. Me… I fear my insecurity announces itself with superfluous words and a desperate need for approval.

I was recently having lunch with my mother when she handed me a beautifully hand written letter. It was on heavy linen stationary, and the penmanship was meticulous and elegant. It was from a friend of hers who wanted to apologize to her for something. It was absolutely lovely. Void of excuses and blaming, it simply apologized for her behavior and asked for forgiveness. It was humble and heartfelt. And I was speechless.

In the era of reality television and social media, perhaps the art of graciousness has been lost. It is far more common to see insults hurled and criticism leveled. Even when we KNOW we have behaved poorly, it is far easier to tally up everyone else’s faults and shortcomings and justify our words and actions. We reek of self-preservation and arrogance.

What a breath of fresh air it was to see someone graciously acknowledging a fault. Not only was I struck with the honesty of this woman, I was astounded by her confidence. It takes an enormous amount of courage and self-assurance to own EVERY part of who you are; the good, the bad and the ugly.

I am a fan of language, and one of my all time favorite words is “deportment.” It has to do with how you carry yourself. I am once again challenged have a graceful deportment. Now, I highly doubt that I will ever float into a room. I am still more likely to come crashing into it with awkward interruption. But today, I’m inspired to be humble. To be quick to acknowledge a fault. To be quick to ask for forgiveness.

To be a just a little more graceful…

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